Why do Scientists Hate Television

So if I watch TV 3 hours a day for 25 years my cognitive abilities might slow down, largely due to the lack of exercise. Because I sit around watching tv, eating gummy bears and drinking Dr. Pepper my brain will atrophy. And all I have to do to stop it is exercise? Does scratching myself count? Also did those doing the study suffer from sitting in a chair reading their notes for 8 hours a day? And what's the difference between sitting in a chair and working as opposed sitting in a chair watching tv?

Why do these people hate TV so much? Have they not seen The Walking Dead? the Flash. DR. WHO!!!! Why do scientists hate Dr. Who. Its really annoying.

Wait....

I got it.... because they sit around all day doing studies on the government's dime and their brains have atrophied from lack of exercise, they don't realize how awesome television can be!

See what I did there?

post script: I never eat gummy bears I'm secretly afraid that one will stick to one of my crowns and pull it out, then I'll no longer be the tooth king.